“Ride Away, Ride Away”

Cowboy silhouette (see others in my portfolio/lghtbox)  I cannot resist another classic film reference, and if you have not seen “The Searchers,” you need to. John Wayne stars in this 1956 John Ford classic which also features a cast of John Ford regulars. Better yet, the movie has a great theme song sung by the “Sons of the Pioneers:”

 

What makes a man to wander

What makes a man to roam?

What makes a man leave bed and board

And turn his back on home?

Ride away (Ride away), ride away (ride away), ride away   Continue reading

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Who’s On First?

USA Abbott and Costello postage stamp  If you are my age you remember this comedy routine performed by Bud Abbott and Lou Costello as it made its way to late night television and TBS a number of times during the 1970’s. Additionally, a board game with the same name was also released around this time. First performed in 1938 this routine was based on a fictional baseball team in which the players were named Who, What, I don’t Know, Why, Because, Tomorrow, Today and I don’t Care. If you can and could follow the relationship of the players to one another throughout the skit you are better than me.  Continue reading

Ignorance is Bliss…Not!!!

Old book with feather pen         Thomas Gray penned “Where ignorance is bliss, ’tis folly to be wise” in his poem Ode on a Distant Prospect of Eton College, written in 1742. Today this phrase has become synonymous with apathy and a carefree attitude. In my mind it takes its place with classics such as, “it’s only a lot of reading if you do it,” or “it only takes a minute if you wait to the last minute.” Each of the phrases represents what I call a lack of situational awareness.  Continue reading

How Should I Handle a Mortgage When Divorcing?

I just published this article on my website:

Mortgage concept by money house from the coinsIn addition to dividing assets when getting divorced, couples must also address debts. This means they must choose how to handle mortgages as well as homes.

Divorcing spouses in Colorado who own a home together must generally wrangle with the question of what they will do with their home once divorced. Many people, especially women, have strong emotional ties to their homes. This can make the thought of selling a home very difficult and upsetting.

If young children are involved, concerns about maintaining stability for the kids often contribute to a decision to keep a home. For other people, they prefer to sell a home so as to get more physical and emotional distance from their prior marriages and lives.

Houses and mortgages are not the same

Regardless of what people decide to do with their home, it is important for spouses to remember that making a choice about a home is not the same as making a choice about a mortgage. Conscious and deliberate thought must be given to what should happen to the financial liability associated with a home .

Selling a home

Bankrate explains that among the many options divorcing spouses have, selling a home may be one of the cleanest and least pitfall-ridden from a purely financial perspective. This eliminates any future financial ties regarding the mortgage between spouses once the divorce is over.

If the home’s equity is less than the amount owed on it, a short sale may be required. While this may have some negative credit impact, it again makes a clean break for both spouses.

Sharing the mortgage

If the couple keeps the home even if only one spouse will continue to live in it, they could choose to maintain a joint mortgage. Spouses should be very careful about this arrangement even if a divorce decree specifically states that one spouse is responsible for making the mortgage payments.

If both names are on the mortgage, both people can be held accountable for the debt. Any missed payments or foreclosure can negatively affect both spouses’ credit. According to Time, this is true even if a quitclaim deed transfers ownership of the home to one person only. Again, homes and mortgages are not one in the same.

Refinancing

One person may wish to keep the house and is able to get a new mortgage in his or her name only. This avoids the issues associated with maintaining a joint mortgage and lets the spouse who wants the home have it.

Getting the right guidance

In addition to remembering that homes and mortgages should both be reviewed, decisions about either should not be made in vacuums. Working with an attorney when getting divorced is always recommended so Coloradans can understand their full financial picture with all assets and liabilities viewed together.

“No, It Isn’t All Yours”

Piece of of chocolate cake on the tableWe have all been faced with the following situation: there is one slice of cake left and everyone wants a piece. How can you ever hope to divide the remaining piece so that everyone who wants some is satisfied? Well, the simple answer is that you cannot without some form of compromise. Similarly, ending a marriage, dividing property, and agreeing to a parenting plan, all involve choices, and compromises. Continue reading

“Houston, we have a problem”

Spaceship In Space Most of us remember these words spoken by Tom Hanks in the movie “Apollo 13” (or if you’re old like me you remember the actual event), and for me the words represent a moment in which the astronauts realize they had a problem beyond their ability to solve. We all have these moments, but as to when we recognize such moments is different for each of us, and sometimes it can be too late.   Continue reading

Parents Matter

Paper man chain of familyI originally was going to title this blog, “Dads Matter,” but I changed it to the present title because both parents matter in the lives of their children. The impact of a parent will be for either good or bad depending upon the choices each parent makes, but there will be an impact one way or another. In my own life I cannot overstate the influence of my parents in my life. My father told me he loved me for the first time the night before I married. I was 20 years old, but I remember him sitting on my bed and telling me. It was great to hear it, but he had told me in so many ways while I was growing up it was almost unnecessary for him to say the words. My dad is 88, and I speak to him weekly as do my siblings. We honor him for his influence in our lives.    Continue reading